#55: First Year of Marriage

Last month, Steve and I celebrated 26 years of marriage. When I think back to all we contended with during our first year married, I wasn’t sure the sun would ever shine on us. That first year was easily the craziest, hardest year of my life (and if you’ve been reading my posts, you know my life was by no means a walk in the park). But the storm cleared, and the sun shone brightly on us. 

We were broke, each having less than $100 in our bank accounts. Additionally, Steve was a single father paying alimony to his ex-wife in Korea AND I was pregnant with our first child together. Steve dealt with the courts/Korea to end the alimony so we could afford to live. We could have easily been torn apart from the stress of our daily struggles and uncertainty of our future together. We both brought with us experience from past bad relationships. However, because of this, we knew the love we had for each other was special. We were committed to making us work at all costs and regardless of the challenging circumstances. 

Beyond our financial woes, our time together was limited and taxed. Steve was working two jobs (military and Sam's Club) and was away on TYD in Egypt. There was no facetime, and the only correspondence we had was through old-fashioned letter writing. I was juggling my difficult pregnancy/ postpartum experience, adjusting to being a wife, and new mother to my firstborn and new daughter from Steve’s previous marriage. Postpartum, I dealt with depression from having a newborn with colic and two breast infections from breastfeeding. Regardless, I was determined to build a loving home for Steve and our girls. 

With so few resources, we made the most out of what we had. We always took advantage of anything we could do as a family for cheap. We attended festivals, garage sales, and planned short getaways. We celebrated holidays modestly in our small apartment (we didn’t have a big extended family to gather with, it was up to Steve and I to make holidays meaningful). In fact, I would run the local Turkey Trot in an attempt to win us a turkey. Steve would jokingly say to me, “no pressure, but if you don’t win, we won’t have a turkey this year…” We shared the load and the love and we made it work, the best we could. 

Although our time together that first year was limited, the time we did have was wonderful. We prayed, loved, laughed, enjoyed, and supported one another. Even though year one was our hardest year, we sit back now and appreciate how much we learned and how close we grew. Steve and my foundation is STRONG, and we are blessed to still share the same love and affection now as empty nesters. 

Every time we hear Danny’s Song, we both instinctively break into a smile and sing in unison: “even though we ain’t got money, I’m so in love with you honey, and everything will bring a chain of love…” We continue to love, laugh, and learn together. Our love has only grown. I have no regrets, and cannot imagine my life without my partner, Steve Keller. 


Until Next Time…